Scott Hodge


Biblical Curse Generator

Sep 29, 2005


Ship of Fools has perhaps the greatest web invention since Google.  Ok, well maybe not, but it is kind of fun.  It’s called the Biblical Curse Generator.  Just type in what you would LIKE to say to someone and it will generate the Biblical equivilent of "(@*#&$@#$(*&!!!!"

Here’s a few that I typed in (I’ll share only the translation…):

Woe unto thee, thou babbling Assyrian, for you will be smitten with all-over boils! 

Woe unto thee, O ye creature of the pit, for you will be thrown into a den of hyperactive lions! 

I hope you will be whipped with a thousand scorpions, O ye armpit of Satan! 

May you be cast onto a steaming dung-heap, O thou incompetent tax-collector! 

Thou shalt fall under a speeding chariot, thou sad Pharisee! 

I pray thou shalt become as popular as a boil on the king’s backside, thou sad Pharisee!

Try it for yourself! 

Link (via)

5 Responses to “Biblical Curse Generator”

  1. Pat Callahan says:

    Take heed, O thou lazy Babylonian, for you will be as welcome as a fart in the queen’s bedchamber!

  2. Great Stuff. I passed it along to my ex-father in law who’s a pastor.

  3. David says:

    That’s awesome! I’ve been looking for ways to put the word “smite” in my daily communte to work! =)

  4. Rachel says:

    How cool, a way to cuss spiritually. And to think I thought I had heard everything!!

  5. matt says:

    Very clever, but it is seriously going to take a lot of renewing of my mind to change “stupid jerk” for “May you be mocked by eunuchs, O thou offspring of a squashed cockroach!” next time I get cut off.

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